"...In the end, people either have excuses or experiences; reasons or results; buts or
brilliance. They either have what they wanted or they have a detailed list of all the rational reasons why not."

~ Anonymous
(taken from Matt Erbele's, It Takes Time to Get Good)

Friday, March 7, 2008



The 'Yikes' title could just have easily been about my weight and eating. According to the scale this morning, I trained for, and ran a marathon and gained weight. On the scale this morning

137 * sigh*

Argh! It isn't my "official weigh in day. Which, let's be honest doesn't happen all that often anymore. Amazing how when you know you have been eating like shit you don't want to weigh yourself. The REALLY scary part is that my eating isn't that out of control for me and I am exercising quite a bit, but apparently it doesn't take too much out of control for me to blow up like the Stay Puff marshmallow man! I can feel the weight gain in my jeans, I can see it in my face. This has been going on for months now.

It. Must. Stop.

I can't seem to get a handle on the food frontier again. I have been cooking (I know, my mother is as stunned as you!) dinners and then packing leftovers for lunch. I am eating out less, but am still sneak eating cake and burritos in the car. (TOTALLY embarrassing to admit, but I am in trouble here. Time to get totally honest) Yes, I am a 38 year old professional woman that keeps plastic forks in her car so that she can buy a HUGE piece of cake and scarf it in the car so no one knows. Well, no one, but her ever expanding ass!

Help...I am feeling very sorry for myself this morning even though I am the only one to blame for this.


Willie said...

Hey it probably isn't all your bad eating. When I trained for my first marathon I gained weight also. I was pissed! I though sure running millions of miles would lighten the load a little but it actually added about 5 pounds. I guess muscle weighs more than fat. I have the same problem as you, I eat like shit. The only thing saving me from being a blimp is running. Maybe I'll join you in your quest for a better diet. Don't get too down though, you still RAN A MARATHON! Not everyone can say that (even most twig-like women!) You're in a special group.

Southbaygirl said...

First of all-muscle does weigh more than fat!!! Remember that woman!!!! The skinny chicks who don't do shit weigh nothing because they are all flab with NO MUSCLE!!! Muscle is sexy and HOT!

Second of all-how tall are you? Because I'd pay money to weigh 137!!!

I know that when I reached a certain age, and it was about 36 or 37, I couldn't eat the way I had-even with all my running-everything changed and it sucked! I developed a thyroid condition, aches and pains, couldn't drink as much(of course that could be a blessing in disguise)....so i've had to radically change my diet! And it's working. Of course not that I don't crave my chocolate or my salty potato chips, because I do, but I now only give myself a little bit of it. And once I stopped eating all meat but fish I noticed a huge difference.....but that's with my fat ass body!! Everyone is different!

If you're really bothered by your weight-like I said 137 sounds f-ing great to me, you just have to really force yourself to not eat a HUGE portion of the things you crave, ie that huge piece of cake...just have a few bites really slowly and put the rest away! I always try to see how long I can keep a dessert in the fridge!!!

I know, easier said than done biatch.....but you are not alone!!! Everyone has their own food demons/battles/cravings etc.... and Willie is so correct. You just ran a marathon! Not many people can say they've done that!!!

I worked with the idiot Paris Hilton yesterday-she has NO MUSCLE at all and is flabby!!! She's nasty to look at!!! Muscle is so cool!!!

You are a rockstar!!!!!

Southbaygirl said...

You know I know how you feel! I've always battled that horrible ideal of what I should look like and how much i should weigh-shit I still do to some extent! I think it's still one of my demons-and I blame my weight on my failed or lack of relationships. So I do know exactly what you are saying! And it sucks! Why can't we be happy with who we are? After my 42 years, I'm slowly accepting myself. I'm a big girl-I'll never be skinny-but I'm not a weakling! I'm a strong, powerful woman who can run, lift, bike, lift 70 lb camera onto my shoulder and those skinny little boney girls can't do what i do!!! We are beautiful and wonderful!!!! And you ran a marathon and you do triathalons! You are amazing! You have an amazing husband who loves you, a great job, a great furry family and your are healthy and fit! How lucky you are!!!!