"...In the end, people either have excuses or experiences; reasons or results; buts or
brilliance. They either have what they wanted or they have a detailed list of all the rational reasons why not."

~ Anonymous
(taken from Matt Erbele's, It Takes Time to Get Good)

Monday, September 19, 2011

Race Report: Moo Cow Half Marathon - September 18, 2011

Yes, you read that right, I actually did a race. Of course if you have been reading this blog for more than 3 minutes you know that I do not "race" per say. I am a running purest purist (Damn you, SQ! Of course, SQ making me feel stupid is like Kate Moss making me feel fat. Meh. Does not even register)

It is not the competiton that draws this moth to the running flame it is important things like: cute t-shirts, good post race food, and pretty locales.

I rarely, if ever, "race" because when I do it becomes obvious that I will still lose to everyone and that is not good for my self esteem. 


Total Distance: 13.23 miles
Total Time: 2:48:54 (whatever)
Total Climb: According to Garmin 2100 ft (That is too much. Garmin is always wrong, but it was significant. I need to find a good GPS data cleaner. If anyone knows one, please let me know.)


Thursday my buddy Penny sent out an email saying she had a registration for the Inaugural Petaluma Moo Cow Half Marathon and she would not be able to make it up from LA to run it and she asked if anyone wanted her bib. I had a 10ish mile run on the schedule this weekend that was not super jazzed about running alone and the race has a cute logo, so, yes, I was interested!


Truth be told, for all my f-word slinging, trash talking, bravado I am a rule follower. I would love to say I am one of those devil may care, stand up against The Man non-conformists, but in actuality, if the sign says "Do not walk on the grass" I will not walk on the grass. It is not born of some deep moral convictions, it is because I do not like to get yelled at. Especially when I am wrong.


The race said no transfers of registration, so I would have impersonate my friend to get the bib on race day. And that is what I did.  

Apparently a cute cow logo will make me throw caution to the wind and become the rebel of my dreams.
I envisioned the woman at the packet pick up shouting IMPOSTER! and two goons clad in Moo Cow gear hauling me away from the table in shame, threatening to call my mother and tell her what a horrible, dishonest daughter she raised.

In reality, the gal handing out numbers at packet pick up could have given two shits if I said I was Oprah Winfrey at registration. As long as the name I said was on the list, she would gladly hand me a number.

 Love her. Do not speak ill of Oprah. It only makes me mad. 

The rebel high has worn off and I am worried about getting my buddy in trouble. so I am 'pinking' out the number. I am aware that may cost me some bad ass points.

The Run 

The temperature was downright perfect, the race was well organized and the town of Petaluma (while smack dab in the middle of fucking nowhere) is really cute and (barring some asshole drivers on the roads, both of the redneck and non-redneck variety) filled with really friendly folk.
 Race start. I love the cow print balloons. 

There was not as much cow spirit on this course as one would expect. I imagine that is because it was the inaugural race, but there was one group that had the cutest cow ear headbands replete with stuffed cow tails that I did not get in the picture. Boo.

So damn cute! The one dude in this picture was leap frogging with me for the first half and then dropped my ass in the second half. I LOVED seeing his shadow with his cow ears flopping as he came up behind me. It made getting passed (and eventually dropped) a lot easier.

The course was pretty, but not breath-taking, unless you count the 'bovine bouquet' Petaluma is known for.

 Horrid example of the pretty, but I find it harder to take photographs on road races. I get all self-conscious and shy. Yes, I said, 'shy.' Shut up. 

Requisite picture of cows. Most of them where too far away for any really fun photo ops.

Another fact you should know about the Petaluma Moo Cow Half is that it is hilly. Not trail run hilly, but certainly enough to get your attention.
A couple of these hurt. A lot.

I met a great gal from Santa Rosa that was faster than me, but her knees were shot so she was walking the uphills (what a coincidence! Despite the fact that my knees were fine, so was I!) I do so love that I have to depend on the injuries or abject misery of other runners to get running partners as slow as me in races, but I usually find someone to run with.  We ran the second half together and played the "races you have run" name drop game. And were able to come in at 2:48:54. Not a PR by any stretch, but for a last minute, hilly race, the weekend after a 20 miler on concrete and asphalt, and an insane work schedule, I will take it! 

Thanks, Penny! I owe you one!

And for your viewing pleasure...

A Lola burrito!

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

For lack of something better to say...

I have been at a bit of a loss for words as of late. I am not sure what to attribute that to, but the shitstorm of the last 2 years certainly has not helped. I have wanted to update anyone that cares, or anyone that does not care, but has nothing better to do than read my ramblings, where I have been lo these last 2 months (it has been pretty boring in RBR land, so I thought I would jazz it up with a dramatic interjection. And yes, I had to look up what part of speech 'lo' qualified as because I know almost no one that knows that. )

Life without Lucy

It has been even more difficult than I anticipated. I knew it would be awful and a huge void in our lives. I knew that the loss of her presence would be crushing. I just did not think I would fucking fall apart, but this is not about that.

This is about poor Lola having to step up into some pretty big shoes and, really, the little shit has fallen short on many fronts. (Didn't see that one coming, did ya? You thought ol' RBR had gone soft on you)

 She is, however, A-DOR-ABLE!

Areas Ms Lola is just not cutting the mustard:

1. Trail dog:  We have given up the ghost. She hates it. She is not suited for it and I am tired of other hikers saying, "Gosh. She looks really unhappy." She is more a 'go to the park twice a day, nap on the couch in between' dog.
Please try to ignore 1. the huge, hideous, 1984, 'dusty rose' sectional couch my parents gave me in 1995 when they could no longer stand it and  2. the fact that I am wearing frog pjs in what is clearly broad daylight.

2. Traveling dog:  This role is work in progress and while she loves to be new places, it is the actual trip in the car that is the sticking point. We have even purchased dog specific car seats for her that cost almost as much as the cars they are placed in, so that she can see out the windows.  Nevertheless, she whines, pants, and jumps out of her doggie car seat which, sadly, she is attached to, so she ends up pinned next to it by her harness, looking bug eyed, tortured, and like an ideal candidate for the next Sarah McLachlan SPCA video.

 Obviously not in the car, but sporting her very best "Save me, Sarah McLachlan" face.

Areas where Ms. Lola has been able to shine, some not so surprising and others downright shocking: 

1.  Fashionista: I do not have all of her outfits photographed (My photographer is opposed to the dressing of our dog and is passive-agressively refusing to photograph her in her duds. Hmpf!) but here are a few highlights: 

Her first sundress.

The little ruffled skirt flounces when she trots at the park. To Die. For. Cute.

One of her three hoodies. Salmon looks a little disapproving. He is a judgmental little fucker.

2.. Hangin' with the girls at the 'bucks: She is all about getting gussied up and soaking up the small dog love at the local Starbucks. 

She is a hit at Starbucks. 

3. Agility: Yes, you read that right. I signed my prissy little dog up for agility class. It is great for building confidence in shy dogs. She went to her first class last night. When we arrived she was the smallest dog BY FAR. Ms. Lola was a tad concerned and frankly so was I. I figured we would gut out one class and if she hated it we would not subject her to the terror of the wild ass dogs that are good at agility, but I sure as shit would not want living in my house.

Not so sure about this

But after we got started she was a total rockstar! She was the best at circle running and the teeter and we even got a really shitty cell phone picture of her jumping! 

She even went over it at the top rung *smug grin*

Marathon Training

Believe it or not I have been running. I did a 20 miler with TNT last weekend and I am getting ready to head to Portland on October 8th! This will not be a fast marathon, but I know I can pretty comfortably finish it. It feels good to be doing distance again, but my consistency is not really where I would like it. Seems like a meager update for a "running" blog, but there you have it.

Weight Watchers

Or as I like to call it my weekly humiliation. Eddy is, as one would have guessed, a total fucking ROCKSTAR at losing weight. I try to be gracious about it, but I tell you it makes me think very bad, very prosecutable thoughts when I step on the scale after he has lost 3 pounds in a week and I have gained after running 26 miles that week and eating my 29 measly ass points.

He has lost 23 pounds.

I have lost 9.6 pounds.

He looks amazing (granted that is a 'win' for me too, but focus people, I am on a rant here.)

I look the same.

I decided to be 100% honest about my weekly trials and tribulations of WW in this graph of my actual weight loss to date. I do this because: 1. I want to give hope to women in their 30's and above that are trying to lose weight and are struggling with the ups and downs of the scale, both deserved and not and 2. I am avoiding grading and an excel spreadsheet is an excellent way to do that. We always hear the end result and say, "wow, that is so great! Why can't I do that?"

What is inspired me to do this was a woman that talked about it taking her 2 years to lose 25 pounds and that she has kept it off for 10 years now. People may be discouraged by that, but as a chronic yo-yo dieter for over 20 years now it sounded, well,  real. I have NEVER maintained a weight. I always in the process of losing or gaining.  I am not trying to regain some mythical bikini body, I just want to fit in my clothes, be comfortable in my own skin, and stay healthy. So here it is. This annotated graph represents the last 12 weeks and  $132 on WW: