The next line in the song (after the Golden Rule bit, which ... yeah, right) is
"Readin' and 'ritin' and 'rithmetic Taught to the tune of the hickory stick"
Teaching to the tune of a hickory stick! Now, there is a tradition that is sorely missed. At least by me. Last year I was known to lament that stocks were deemed "cruel and unusual" punishment and the fact that I was not issued a chair and bull whip when I received word of which "special" students were assigned to my class.
I must say though, that when the ol' Gods of Scheduling were divvying up the cherubs this year, I got pretty darn lucky. So much so that I almost have nothing to bitch about.
Don't worry it is week 2. They are sophomores. I am certain they will not disappoint.
I will instead bitch about my colleagues...'cause I am classy like that.
I present to you a letter in response to the deluge of annoying shit that has already occurred in this newly dawned school year.
Dear Esteemed Colleagues:
1. You have TWO options when replying to an email, "Reply" and "Reply all." Be aware of the audience you are sending an email too. We all do not need to know that your daughter has an orthodontist appointment and you will not be attending the faculty lunch. Nor do we need you to prove to us how "important" you are by listing every meeting you are attending this month to show the one person that gives a shit about your schedule that you are available Wednesday at 3 pm for a collaboration that 95% of us in your "Reply all" list are not involved in.
Now, I am NOT referring to the gal that hit "Reply all" and proceeded to flame the shit out of the original sender's spelling and grammar, because, really, that shit was entertaining as hell and made for a uber- fun staff wide lecture on professional compassion where the whole thing got started again and grammatical errors within the flame itself were criticized. It was AWESOME.
2. Please do not speak to me like I am 7. I am considerably older than 7. For example, if I am laughing louder than you would prefer in the main office, two hours before school even starts, I ask that you treat me as you would any other adult that is annoying you. Do you really say "library voices" to other adults in public? And if so, how often do you get your ass kicked? Because I know one Friday morning when you came close.
3. I know, I know, you work harder than me. You work harder than us all. No one has as tough a schedule, as grueling a extracurricular commitment, nor is as fatigued/ill/or cursed, as you. I just have one thing to say, "Shut the fuck up and get off the fucking cross! No one cares."
4. If your automated email signature is longer than 90% of the emails I send, you are possibly full of yourself. If your email signature signs off with "Namaste" you are certainly full of yourself.
Sincerely and with the utmost professional compassion,
Namaste! (See? I have been to a yoga class, too! )
In other news....
(Nope, not spilling the beans on the BIG secret yet. *evil, but UBER excited grin*)
I am running a 50k in less than 2 weeks with the GeekGirl herself. Afterward we are going to crew for her husband, S. Baboo, as he does ANOTHER 100 miler (he did Leadville 2 weeks ago!!) It is the Rio del Lago 50K. I am registered. My room is booked. I am going. I am soooooo excited, but soooooooo SCREWED!
More on that later....
17 hours ago